I Know

My 17 year old self on bullying.

I Know

Hide it.

Boast all you want, I know.

Insecurities flood your thoughts, words,

Your movement and touch.

Your boisterous laugh doesn’t cover

Your eyes.

They look around for the disapproving

Frantically, for what could be done

If you were to be pushed away?

Pushed away like the others.

You remember them.

You spat in their faces.

I know.

And to be different is to be desired.

Every one else is, and so are you.

All fighting, with black and blood and hate and gore

To be different.

So different that I can read you like a book.

Each and every one of you.

Don’t you have anything better to present me with?

Come on, laugh, I will push you away.

Like you pushed away the others.

Only my foot will cause you to trip.

Because I am different, I have achieved it.

With black and blood and hate and gore,

Different enough to follow the crowd.

The black sheep in a field of black sheep.

Isn’t it neat to be different?  Different like the rest of you?

Keep fighting to hide it.

Behind those frantic eyes

Because I know.